The Ploch Lobster

Women hate beards. That's why I'm growing one.

2009-03-06T14:54:00.000-08:00

I've noticed something about myself. I really am way too cynical for my age.

Fine, I've been saying that for years. But I think I was kind of proud of it, and saw it as being more perceptive than most people, especially those "god damned optimists." The only problem is, I think I was actually limiting myself, by focusing intentionally on the more "intellectual" side of things. Fuck that, I was being Debbie Downer. The dark lining in a silver cloud . (Ok, a bit of a modified version of the real expression, but you get my point.) I really just thought I was better than everyone else. Turns out I'm just being a jerk.

Now, I'm a pretty smart guy. Not a genius by any means, but I get by. Now I just need to figure out what to do with that. All through high school I barely passed, thinking I was smarter than a lot of the teachers, so why should I have to do homework? I knew better than them. If I met myself back then, I would punch myself in the jaw. And this was only two years ago. I don't even know what's wrong with me. All I know now is that I have a future that's brimming with potential, and I can start over, in a sense.

There will always be a part of me that is cynical, but I hope to suppress it when necessary, and enjoy things more. And if this isn't how you saw me, I can use the encouragement.

I love you all.

Conscientious Objector?

2008-11-04T08:45:00.000-08:00

Does the term apply here? Oh well, I'm using it anyway.

Due to a combination of procrastination and indignation, I'm not voting this year. Obama's platforms sound a whole lot like socialism to me. And socialism, people, is what began World War II and the Holocaust. Hitler's socialistic ideals were what drove him to determine that humanity was not prepared for equality. This did not stop him, however, from using his natural charisma and talent of speaking to gain the trust and control of an entire nation, and claiming power over all of Nazi Germany. And, as we all know, brought on the destruction of a myriad of nations, and the near genocide that followed. My first point.

My second point is Canada. Now, Canada sucks. You're not allowed to smoke in your own home, as you cannot truly own your home. You are limited to a certain amount of money you can make per year. And the Federal government issues free drugs to rehabs, to keep addicts off the streets.

What?

And don't get me started about the health care. You'll be lucky if the doctors are more qualified than your mother. Just ask Ian Mofo Kelly. He'll tell you: "Don't fuck up. Ever." The sight of his horribly stitched thumb has scarred me from ever wanting to live too far north, with the goal of being as far away from Canada as is possible. And Obama wants to make healthcare free. To what end? To cause the deterioration of our entire medical nation? Competition breeds skill and diligence. To eliminate competition is to eliminate what makes our healthcare so great. This nonsensical anti-logic is becoming more and more like communism. So close in likeness, in fact, that the phrase uttered during the cold war, "Fear the red death!" should be updated to a more appropriate phrase for this nation's circumstances. "Fear the Blue Death!", our nation shall cry, and in a small and insignificant voice, I shall whisper.

"I told you so."

McCain is better, but why should we trust him? He is a chameleon, ever shaped by those around him, adapting himself to fit whatever guise is necessary to gain office. McCain has voted with some very liberal-oriented bills and policies, and it has become clear to me what most republicans will deny, deny, deny until they are blue in the face (no pun intended): McCain is not a conservative. No, in fact, McCain has previously (and recently) supported abortion, and only until he had decided to run on the republican ticket did he declare otherwise. This is not McCain's plan, to instill in the executive branch of the government the morals and the stances I know to be right as a conservative. His goal is to appease whoever necessary to gain the approval of the majority of the country. I cannot trust McCain, and so I will not vote for him.

So who, you ask, am I voting for? Nobody. I refuse. Bitter arguments between brothers and sisters are not what's best for this country. They are, in fact, what the great George Washington, the first and greatest president of the United States, warned us about. "Stay away from political parties," he warned, and we did not listen, to my eternal shame and embarrassment as an American. What place does our current national struggle have for love?

Love is the answer. My friend Landon has been proclaiming it for weeks, and I agree with him. The national problems would be nothing, nonexistent, if feelings of bitterness and resentment were replaced with love. So I challenge you, as a man, as a Christian, as an American: love your brother. Don't hold grudges. Forgive and forget. Listen. Understand. Your eyes will be opened. Don't let this presidency destroy our nation.

P.S. I voted for Mitt Romney.

MIDI Sucks, Man: Pt. 2.

2008-10-30T17:54:00.000-07:00

I didn't pass.

And now I have to sit through this lame ass class, a second time, because I couldn't pay attention to the teacher. Awesome. At least I get to hang out with people I wouldn't have normally been able to see otherwise. So that's cool. I guess.

iChat

2008-10-11T17:12:00.000-07:00

Rules. Seriously, it's freaking awesome. And I have a webcam. Which doubles the coolness level.

Anyone want to video chat?

Ugh.

2008-10-11T17:11:00.000-07:00

Don't you just love double standards?

Romeo's Dead, Sweetheart.

2008-09-18T08:18:00.001-07:00

Nestled away

In foreign arms

Counting the sins

When he is gone.

Drinking away your God's law

Not even He can forgive anymore

And I can taste the world on your lips

I can feel the sweat sink into your skin

You are like a church, anyone can come in

Oh, baby, you make it too easy to sin.

You're looking out for some new flesh

To spread your curse until there's nothing left

So here's to you in your short dress

Buy everyone a drink until they're impressed.

And I can taste the world on your lips

I can feel the sweat sink into your skin

You are like a church, anyone can come in

Oh, baby, you make it too easy to sin.

You'll see me Sunday, coming from the shadows

By the time it's over, you'll be hanging from the gallows

Who would've thought you could ever make me hurt less?

You look so pretty in your brand new necklace.

You'll see me Sunday, coming from the shadows

By the time it's over, you'll be hanging from the gallows

Who would've thought you could ever make me hurt less?

You look so pretty in your brand new necklace.

In your necklace.

MIDI sucks, man.

2008-09-18T08:18:00.000-07:00

How am I gonna pass this class?

I am, at this very moment, not paying attention to the quiz review in MIDI lecture. It's so dry. At least there's not much information for the whole class, so the teacher, who is living in the feel-good era of the 70s, lets us go home after we take the quizzes. As a matter of fact, I could probably go home right now and study the textbook to learn everything thus far in about thirty five minutes. Which I'm gonna need to do. Because I find it near impossible to pay any attention to this lecture.

There goes my 3.5.

Daryl Palumbo.

2008-09-05T23:07:00.000-07:00

Landon told me to update my blog. So I am.

I started to write this whole convoluted and self righteous blog about how I want to be a millionaire, but I blew it out my ass instead. I would rather talk about Daryl Palumbo. Dude is a freaking genius. Lead vocalist for Glassjaw, Head Automatica, and House of Blow, and suffers from Crohn's disease. He is the definition of vocalist. The versatility is undeniable, the control is incredible.

When I first listened to Worship and Tribute, Glassjaw's second major album, I thought there were points in which Daryl's voice was put through some sort of processor, to make his voice's pitch bend a little, maybe even speed up. However, after listening quite closely for some time, I came to realize that Daryl was the one causing his voice to fluctuate in that manner. Glassjaw's first major album, Everything You Ever Wanted to Know About Silence, was an extremely influential album in the Genres of Hardcore, Metal, and Post-Hardcore.

And we all know Beating Heart Baby. Classic Head Automatica.

Moreover, it was House of Blow that threw me for a loop. Daryl's vocals are over an almost Hip Hop type beat. Although I was only able to find one song, it had a very interesting sound.

Feel free to listen to the playlist, I put songs up from all three bands.

Freakin' Daryl. God, I'm Jealous.

Politics and Pornography.

2008-08-28T23:23:00.000-07:00

So, I just read that some dude named John Stagliano, a porn producer, has been indicted for obscenity, namely his films Puppies and The Young Fluffy Bunny (the names of the films have been removed due to their obscenity and replaced with new titles, hoping to suit the general public's needs). I also read that this guy faces a possible lifetime sentence.

What?

I mean, I disagree with pornography and what it stands for, but I disagree with rape and murder a whole lot more. Does this guy really deserve a sentence befitting a rapist? How about a murderer?

What I find even more interesting is the fact that every time Free Speech is on the line, blame is laid on republicans. This case specifically, because, obviously, George W. Bush is in the office of the executive branch. Ok, fine. You're right. He is in office. But the three branches of government were put in place to avoid one man having the majority of the government's sway. Checks and balances. Stagliano is on trial. Key word. Trial. Clearly the judicial system's jurisdiction. And based on previous supreme court decisions, the court does not lean towards any particular wing of the government.

It's just so classy to blame Bush. How trendy.

I depress myself sometimes.

Open for Business

2008-08-28T23:03:00.000-07:00

Well, I just have way, way, too much to say.

I talk a lot.

So I figured I'd start a blog. This way i can blow off steam without hurting people's ears within earshot. I really don't even care if anyone reads it, actually. I just feel better knowing that if someone wanted to, they could. It kind of makes me feel better about myself. Like I'm important. It's a good feeling, you should try it sometime.

I also like the idea that I can stay in contact with all of my friends in Jersey, and some who aren't.

I miss you all.